No Teaching Allowed…Just Discovering

I grew-up making bulletin boards, cutting lamination, and coloring games for my Mom’s classroom as a kid. I was blessed (at least looking back now I see it that way) to have a Mom that was an amazing educator in the classroom and at home. During the summer we would have “learning” time and playtime…who does that to your child…right? But, alas, I have to publicly thank my Mom for taking the time to invest in me and the knowledge that I acquired throughout my childhood.

With my son approaching 18 months I’ve started noticing parents have more and more proud moments of their children. “Johnny just learned dog, cat, and can say 82 other things.” While I’m always impressed I also wonder how the heck did Johnny learn those things? I also wonder…did Johnny have fun and play while learning?

All that being said…

Recently I was fortunate to hear a speaker talk about when your child is young it is incredibly important to focus on them being in an environment where they can play and learn, but what is most important is for parents to discover how their child learns. What a brilliant point!

 So, I’ve created super basic/fun lesson plans (using that term very loosely).

I plan to post what I’m doing weekly. If you feel like getting ideas, or following along with your little one just checkout the blog.

Good luck discovering how your child learns…hope this helps.

(Please post ideas on the blog too)

On Your Marks...Get Set...Scan!

Registering for a baby was even more overwhelming for me than registering for our wedding. I was super blessed to have my sister give a ton of guidance. Some of my girlfriends are expecting their first little bundles of joy this year and I thought it might be helpful to give them “sisterly” advice/tips should they need, or want it…so here you go…

 

Side note: Many large market baby store retailers give you registry lists to work from…well they are great as a starting point, but here is my opinion on the skinny of what you must have and what you can wait on, or forgo altogether.

(Big fan of Amazon and Buy Buy Baby (BBB). BBB allows price matching even off of what you find on the internet).

MUST HAVE:

·       Breast pump- if you’re breastfeeding you will want this sucker (ha). I’m a huge fan of Medela. They are expensive, but worth every penny. If you are working outside the home, or are thinking your husband might be helping with feeding…you need a good pump! (Remind me about the Kindle friends by the way).

·       Breast pads- disposable ones are great for travel so get a box or two, but I’m a bigger fan of cotton washable ones. Get enough packs you can go a week without doing laundry. When you wash these puppies throw them in a netted bag…or just like the sock monster the pad monster will strike.

·       Breast milk storage bags- Medela’s are awful…and they are more expensive. I’m a bigger fan of Lansinoh. You will need multiple boxes. These are B1G1 half off quite frequently at major retailers.

·       Breastfeeding cover- Get a nice one. The bigger the better.

·       Nursing pillow- I loved the Boppy. I got two covers so I could wash them each week (and would Lysol all the time).

·       Burping cloths- I actually liked Babies R. Us brand the most. Other ladies have raved about using cloth diapers. All in all just remember bigger ones are better. I have a few cute trendy ones, but they were so skinny that when the milk missile hit…I got hit.

·       Diapers- if you go disposable I enjoyed Pampers the most. Huggies leaked a ton for us. Get higher numbers and get the lower ones as you go. You never know how big your baby is gonna be when he/she arrives so don’t get super small ones right away. If you happen to have a ton you don’t use I highly recommend giving them to a local shelter. Regarding price…Sams is the cheapest (or NEX for military folks…with free shipping).

·       Baby Wipes

·       Travel wipe container

·       Bottles- you will need 6-8 compatible with your breast pump and I would also get another 6-8 larger ones in another brand. I used Born Free, but only because they were given to me…and they worked great.

·       Bottle warmer- nice to have as it speeds up the process. All are pretty comparable. It will be a kitchen accessory for quite a few months so you might want to get one you semi like the looks of.

·       Bottle drying rack

·       Bottle brush- get a dual pack that has the big brush and nipple brush. We washed our bottles in the dishwasher though most times. I used the brushes on the bottles that I used with the pump.

·       Dishwasher caddy- we got two. Nipples take forever to dry…so when the dishwasher kicked off we would have a caddy we could still throw the spare in the machine to load.

·       Insulated tote (truthfully you can get free ones from formula companies)

·       Bibs- I would get 5-7 cloth bibs for droll baby happenings and 2-3 eating bibs. Huge fan of Tommee Tippee plastic bibs.

·       Pacifiers- 4-5 of these.  (Trial and error figuring out what they like so get an assortment)

·       Parenting book- I’ll touch on this in another blog if requested

·       Nail clipper- just get a set that has nail clippers, brush, file, etc.

·       Digital thermometer

·       Diaper pail- love the Diaper Genie Elite (register for refills too)

·       Monitor- love the Summer Baby Monitor brand

·       Baby bathtub- we used two. We used a small netted one for the first four months and then switched to a whale tub as our son grew.

·       Hooded towels- four…the thicker the better

·       Washcloths- 12 or so. I would get a few for the bathtub and a few for the kitchen to use on him/her when you wash them up after meals.

·       Body wash & lotion- at night (which is when we give baths) I love the Johnson & Johnson Lavender & Chamomile

·       Cotton swabs- with the big tips.

·       Diaper ointment- Desitin.

·       Diaper bag- get one you love. This will become your daily accessory for the next few years. I splurged and got one I really liked. We also keep a small spare in my hubby’s car.

·       Changing mat- this will be needed for the changing table.

·       Outlet covers- Being proactive on this one is best.

·       Infant car seat- Liked the Chico Key Fit (we had two bases so each car had one).

·       Stroller- Chico. (there are tons of good ones…just saying what we enjoyed)

·       Umbrella Stroller- Get a super nice one. You will use this one more than anything once they have head control and are bigger. Just make sure you get one with a good warranty and a larger weight limit so it will last longer. We went with Maclaren.

·       Jogging Stroller- If you are active it’s worth the investment. This was one other one we spent good money on, but we looked at it as an investment and it has been used a ton. We went with the Bob brand.

·       Full-size Swing- Great to use when they are little! We had “stations” that we would rotate our son though daily. He would have swing, tummy, and music lamb chair time.

·       Baby Carrier- Nice to have while they are super little and you have errands to run. I was given my sister’s old Baby Bjorn and it was great.

·       High-chair- I’ve enjoyed having a 3 in 1 seat.

·       Booster seat- Nice to have once they are getting into toddler times and can have snacks. It trains them to be behaved in restaurants.

·       Bassinet- we just used a small travel crib that we kept in our bedroom for the first three months.

·       Crib

·       Mattress

·       Mattress Cover

·       Sheets- Get sheets that are made for the company of cribs you are using. (two sets)

·       Changing Table- We ordered a bedroom set that matched through Amazon. (way cheaper than the baby stores). We also had a spare changing table that we kept in our room. The first few months when you are sleep deprived it stinks having to walk the baby back to their room every few hours in the night. We got the spare table at a garage sale. (it was an old desk and now it’s my vanity…all about repurposing).

·       Dresser

·       Rocker & Ottoman

·       Blankets- To use while you are out and about (two-three total)

·       Lamp(s)

·       Curtains & Blinds (just make sure they are away from the crib and cords are tied-up)

·       Hamper

·       Books

·       Play Gym- Great for tummy time!

·       8-10 Onesies (might need short and long-sleeves) & Pants/shorts.

·       Head covering- If you are in a colder climate

·       PJs- Get zippers (you will thank me in the middle of the night). Five total.

·       Socks

 

MIGHT GET:

·       Breast cream- Lansinoh is great. Truthfully though you might not need it right away.

·       Feeder for strained foods

·       Rattles

·       Teether- might want to wait and see if you need.

·       Humidifier- you can just wait and see if you need.

·       Bath toys

·       Wipes warmer- we bought ours from a consignment store. It does help a little, but truthfully there isn’t a huge difference.

·       Convertible Car Seat- you will need, but you can wait until they are older and watch for sales.

·       Baby Sunshade

·       Jumper- Good to have, but you won’t need for a while.

·       Play Area- Nice to have once they are mobile.

·       Splat Mat- only if you don’t have dogs, or you have lighter carpet.

·       Crib Bedding- bumpers and blankets aren’t recommended so you are kinda wasting money if you opt not to use. We ended up using them, but only for decoration.

·       Basket & Storage Bins

·       Wall Hangings

·       Toys- Although you won’t use until they are older and they will get spoiled at holidays…so no need to really register for these items.

·       CDs

·       Frames

·       Baby book

·       Homecoming Outfit

·       Clothing Hangers

·       Baby Mittens

FORGET ABOUT IT:

·       Bottle sterilizer- uh…never used it, or did it…I know I’m a horrible Mom.

·       First aid kit- you probably already have what you need.

·       Baby bath sponge

·       Baby oil

·       Alcohol swabs & petroleum jelly (and cotton balls)- you will need some items if you have a boy and he is circumcised, but wait and get those items once you know.

·       Cabinet & door latches- These WILL be needed, but not for a few months. Wait until there is a soon to be need.

·       Safety gates- same as above. Just look for sales after they are born.

·       Travel mirror- most safety experts actually say these aren’t safe anymore.

·       Booster car seat- WAIT! They are only good for so many years so don’t get until you need.

·       Strap covers, neck wings, head support, full-body support, car seat toys, car seat under mat, etc.- not as safe and not needed.

·       Stroller toys, netting, weather shield, blanket, etc.- not worth it.

·       Travel Swing

·       Mobile Walker- Dangerous and no longer recommended.

·       High Chair Cover

·       Formula- If you have trouble breastfeeding just ask your doctor for samples until you can figure out what is best. Go ahead and get the freebies you can in the mail…those will help too.

·       Crib Mobile- Some safety stuff has been advised so we didn’t use.

·       Wall Border

·       Rug

·       DVD

Hope this helps. Email me at askmamadrama@gmail.com with questions. Happy shopping and registering!

 

 

 

My Perfect Family

This past year there has been a ton of studies done on whether Facebook (and other social media outlets) make people more depressed due to comparing themselves to others. There have been conflicting findings and I thought I should go ahead and clarify what my perfect family really is…no need to base us off just a few hundred posts and pictures my friends see each year.

For every picture you see of my son smiling…just know that at some point that week (or day) he was crying. He has an amazing laugh, but he also can stomp his feet like a champion when he wants something.

For every post where I praise my husband…just know we are human and we strive to love unconditionally, but only God can truly provide that love. We work at our marriage. We do nightly devotionals and attend church weekly…we try to protect what we have by growing with God…it doesn’t just “happen.”

For every post where I show a project from Pinterest I’ve completed, a pie I’ve baked, a scarf I've made, etc. it’s probably because I needed a quiet moment of sanity…not because I have all the time in the world, or am bored. There are days where I can’t sing “The Wheels on the Bus” one more time so I grab paint and a brush and escape Mommy Land for a moment.

For every post where you see amazing places we travel or go…we’ve saved to get there. The smile at the mountain top is because we are overflowing with joy because we made our priorities for the year to save to be in that exact location at that very moment. We aren’t wealthy and probably never will be…but we have more than enough “stuff” and we live comfortably…but don’t think for a second “it just happened for us.”

For every post where you see me hugging and spending time with my child multiple times throughout the day…we sacrifice. By staying at home we live on one income…it’s a sacrifice. It forces us to be incredibly creative with finances, but for us it works.

So before anyone looks at my life and thinks even for a second it’s perfect…it’s perfect for me…it’s precisely what I want and need, but just make sure when you compare yourself to others you realize that if you videotaped the Bertsch family for a full day you would see the following:

·       Me waking up with an 80s pony-tail (every morning)

·       A good morning song to my son (that is totally off key)

·       An inspection of treasures (AKA poop patrol) prior to PJ change…and yes…I talk like Steve Irwin while this is being performed

·       Mealtime

·       Playtime that contains coloring, singing, laughing, playing, and learning (and me totally looking hilarious to spectators)

·       Naptime (AKA my sanity break)

·       Mealtime

·       More playtime (or errands which are at times a war zone all of their own)

·       Naptime (Alas…another sanity break)

·       Mealtime

·       Family walk and/or playtime

·       Bedtime (AKA LONG sanity break)

To most people it would totally appear boring/routine…yet to me…my life is perfect…at least for me. So I guess I’m writing this as a reminder to myself to put down on paper what the desires of my heart are. I want to live a life that is full of love and laughter. I want to raise a child that is an amazing man and contributes to society in a way that leaves a lasting legacy. For me that means taking little to no time to compare myself to others. It means I must remove my expectations off myself that I give myself because of how I visually see other families…because truly…you can’t compare yourself to anyone until you walk a full walk with someone…and for me…I prefer walking the path God has given me.

Be the perfect you…and that’s all that matters! J

90 Day Motherhood Performance Evaluation

Around 90 days ago I left the corporate world and became the Chief Family Officer of the Bertsch household. In the corporate world around the 90 day mark from your start date you are usually given a 90 day performance evaluation to gauge where you are with your new role. I asked Quint (my son) if he wanted to give me a review and he just laughed and stared at me in confusion. (He tends to still not understand all my requests. Ha!). Since my one-year old doesn’t want to give me a review it got me thinking about my new role and how I think I’m “performing.”

I think I’ve become excellent at dealing with clients. The pediatrician and other playgroup moms tend to think I’m pretty swell. I’ve mastered communication by listening to my child’s nonverbal hints regarding his likes and dislikes. I’ve managed to multi-task between starting my own business, applying for work, and playing like a crazy mama. I’ve had to deal with difficult people (primarily named Quint) on multiple occasions and have yet to throw in the towel. I’ve created some new “projects” for the team that have saved us money and effort regarding our parental roles. I’ve brought laughter to the workplace daily. I allow my officemate (Quint) to dance like a wild man and sing (even when words can’t be spoken). I’ve let Quint fail at times…and have allowed myself to fail also as a Mom. We’ve learned together…laughed together…and most importantly loved our moments together.

I’m pretty sure I’m making a contribution to the Bertsch household. I remember thinking in the corporate world that I could never be replaced. Well…that theory was proven somewhat wrong…yet, I feel so blessed and fortunate to have found a new position that I’m quite certain the impact I’m making definitely can’t be replaced. Overall…I give myself a “pass” when it comes to my 90 day eval. I hope many years from now my supervisor (Quint) will be able to provide me with feedback that will solidify my current evaluation. :)

Registering for Sanity

Question:What did you register for that you never needed? 

Answer: I was incredibly lucky and had my sister (a seasoned Mom) with me when I registered. She was able to tell me a quick yes and no regarding what I would really need. Whatever you do don't go off the list Babies R Us provides. Keep in mind it is a HUGE marketing tool for them. Some of the items they encourage you to get you will never use. If you want a detailed list of what I really think you will need let me know and I will post you my list. I had a "need" and "wants" list. I got my "wants" at a second hand store.

Question: What did you wish you would have gotten?

Answer: Sanity, more sleep, etc. Just kidding! If only that was on the registry. How about I tell you what we ended up purchasing in the first six months that we hadn't thought to put on our registry.

• A really good umbrella stroller. Don't go cheap. Keep in mind your little one will use this stroller for the longest time. Look at it like an investment. 
• Jogging stroller. If you are an outdoor kind of person this is another area you will probably want to invest. Now don't get me wrong...I'm not Jane Fonda, but I do love to walk so for me a really nice jogger was a need. 
• Diapers. I applaud all parents that can do cloth diapers...we decided either Mother Nature would be cleaner and happier, or Mama (that's me) would be happier...I won. Don't get me wrong I love me some Planet Earth I just had to determine what I could handle. Anyways...register for very few small diapers. List size 2, 3, & 4 on your registry too. They grow like crazy. The worst is when you have a ton of spares of sizes they can't use. (Donate to a local church or shelter if you have any spares).
• Clothing. You never leave the house in the beginning. No need having a baby looking styling and profiling when they are super little. Register for a ton of clothing for 6 months and beyond. That is when they become mobile and messy:)
• PJ's- ONLY get zipper PJs. Trust me on this one. When you are sleep deprived and milk drunk as I call it...you will learn to despise button PJs. there is nothing worse than running on no sleep and trying to figure out what button you missed.
• Burp cloths- get the super cheap version. Cloth diapers work great for this too.

Lastly, checkout Buy Buy Baby if you have one near you. They price match (even off the internet like Amazon and such). I got my jogging stroller and umbrella stroller way cheaper because I could prove that Amazon was selling it much cheaper.

Have a blast registering. Happy mothering!

Big Bird or Bust

Question: What's your opinion on children watching TV?

Answer: Yikes! Already setting me up to get some blog hatters. Just kidding. I can totally take the heat...I think:) On the answer to this question I actually side with the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP). No TV before they are two years of age and then I plan to still limit TV intake time once they are older. Now I must confess...there have been a few occasions where Ellen might be on in the background while Q (my son) is playing in his playpen. In general though we don't allow Q to be planted in front of the TV.

There is the argument of some parents that claim their son/daughter love Big Bird (or many other characters)! When they watch Sesame Street their little one beams with joy and smiles ear to ear. Uh...of course they do. Even now as an adult if you see some huge yellow bird singing and dancing...you're gonna watch. Most likely you will also die laughing. So can you really gauge that your child is in love with Big Bird and the show is healthy for him/her? Probably not...alas that is why I side with the AAP and Big Bird won't be coming out of his nest until Q is 2ish.

Additional resource:
http://www.healthychildren.org/English/family-life/Media/Pages/Where-We-Stand-TV-Viewing-Time.aspx?nfstatus=401&nftoken=00000000-0000-0000-0000-000000000000&nfstatusdescription=ERROR%3a+No+local+token

Why the blog? Ask away!

Few disclaimers before we begin:

1. I'm not a M.D., Ph.D, etc. If you need SERIOUS help...I'm not your woman. If you need a little humor, honest/opinionated answers...then keep reading and asking questions.
2. Grammar stinks. (I assure you my child will adhere to the standards of society though when they are in school). In this blog grammar will be tossed out the window. I plan to write as I speak...and hopefully that will provide some much needed entertainment to parental units out there.
3. All babies are different. The stories and laughter I will bring you are solely based on my one child thus far. (Guessing many of my opinions will change when baby two comes along in the future).
4. I am not the best Mom out in this world. I am actually far from the best Mom. What I am is incredibly honest, energetic, creative, and fun. When you mix that all together I think that is probably why people come to me for advice.
5. I'm sure there should be a ton more disclaimers...so just to cover my butt...these are ALL opinions and tried and true results from the way my husband and I have parented. In the event the practices don't work...don't get angry, take legal action, etc. If you don't like my thoughts just don't read the blog...super simple:)

I've been a "Mom" for a little over 10 months. I am FAR from an expert. I have learned so much over the past 10 months and I wish that someone would have told me the truth on some topics. Sure...you can learn a ton from "What to Expect...," but I wanted real answers. Ones that at times might scare most people, but I'm a huge fan of honesty. I believe when you mix honesty and humor you can take in and be ready to "hear" almost anything. So all that being said...what do you want to know about Motherhood? What Mama Drama do you want to know more about when you are preparing for your first little one?
Feel free to ask items like:

• What is natural childbirth really like? (Yes, I conquered natural childbirth...keep in mind I'm 5'3" and was 112 lbs prior to delivering...I also had a baby that was almost 9 lbs.)
• How long did it take to lose the baby weight? How the heck did you do it...and can everyone make it happen?
• Does a schedule work for babies?
• What do you really need to register for?
• Any recommendations on how to keep your sanity?
• Baby blues...how long do they last...what did it feel like?
• When is the best time to have help from friends and family members after your little one arrives?
• Any advice to single parents?
• Does it change your relationship with your hubby?
• To breastfeed or not breastfeed (that is the question)?

Those are just a few ideas. I plan to only post when questions come my way...so let the fun begin. You can email me your questions at askmamadrama@gmail.com

Happy reading and motherhood!